June 18, 2006 at 1:03 am (Uncategorized)

booger.JPGFew things are grosser than boogers.



  1. Linda said,

    Mark, WTF? Are you OK, mate? I know you can come up with this wacky shit morning, noon, night or in your sleep, but … boogers?

  2. K2 said,

    Look, Linda, it’s snot a problem.

    Looks like you picked a winner, Mark.

  3. K2 said,

    Mark, you are awfully picky, dig?

    The best snot reference I’ve ever come across in literature is Dickens’ ‘A Christmas Carol.’ Some dude in the street has snot hanging from his nose, and Dickens called it a ‘pendulous excressence.’

    Well, I’m off to work at the olfactory.

  4. K2 said,

    Okay, so I used ‘pick’ twice. Sue me.

  5. AO said,

    Happy Father’s Day to all of you blogging Dad’s!

    K2, is that one of your boggers?

  6. Linda said,

    Would he recognize it AO?

    Gross as boogers are, I think maggots are grosser, but we had a column about maggots already within the last month.

  7. AO said,

    When you have kids, boggers become a part of life. But, maggots on the other hand…ewww. I have to agree with you, Linda. They are one of the grossest things. Maggots and dead squirrels floating in my swimming pool. Gross.

  8. Bobbie said,

    Linda, Mark could have picked a much worse topic than boogers this morning to talk about. Be thankful he stopped there.

  9. Linda said,

    Oh, I’m not complaining about the topic Bobbie — I’m just worrying about him. It’s so unlike him to be so — well — succinct.

    If he’d written twelve paragraphs about boogers, I’d say: just another day in the life. But don’t you think he may have been abducted by aliens, and is trying to send us a coded message, one we can’t possibly read as just a “normal” blog from him?

    Or else the aliens are sending the message, to cover up the fact that they’ve abducted him and are conducting all sorts of weird and probably painful experiments on him. They did OK in “picking” the topic, but they couldn’t mimic the 300 words of ragtime that he’d normally spout on a topic like this.

    Either way, I’m sure he needs help. LOTS of help. What’ll it take, a road trip to a galaxy far far away? Glad I’m on VACATION!

  10. Bobbie said,

    I think that if aliens ever “picked” Mark to do experiments on, they’d soon come to regret it because he’d drive them crazy. Instead of them doing the asking and probing, the aliens would be on the receiving end of things and would find out it wasn’t worth it.

  11. Anonymous said,

    Wait — maybe he IS an alien! or at least was abducted years ago and infiltrated with some of the characteristics that are so, well, out of the ordinary. Maybe WE are the experiment! Maybe we’ll be the first against the wall when the big invasion comes!

  12. Linda said,

    That was me, talking more crap as usual.

  13. Mainetarr said,

    Happy Father’s Day Gil, Weasel, Treehugger, K2, Richie, Robert, Mark, Jarheaddoc and all of the others I may have missed. Hope you guys have a good one!

    This is one topic I can’t take. I am gagging already, so if you don;t hear from me much, that’s why….

    Must have been a big accident or something around here, power went out for 10 seconds, came back on, then there were more fire/poilce than I could count screaming by my house.

  14. Richie said,

    Everyones’ doin’ it

    pickin’ it

    chewin’ it

    thinkin’ its’ candy


    its’ snot.

  15. LaFlamme said,

    Okay, you people aren’t digging the booger topic. God only nose why. But I’ll explain why it’s up there.
    Back when I was setting up WordPress as my new blog program, I experimented by writing small blocks of text and uploading photos. It works entirely different than the old SJ system, you see. And so, after I got it all figured out, I left those experimental blogs up there without publishing them.
    When push comes to shove, and I have literally just second to get something new out before leaving the computer, I was able to just hit “publish” and there it was. A blog worth not much at all, but something new all the same. And I figure, as lousy as it is, it can be just flicked away.

  16. AO said,

    I”m glad you picked it. Happy Father’s Day.

  17. LaFlamme said,

    Thanks, AO. And like a million others out there, I’m waiting for the Sox game. I need to figure out a way to get my TV in the backyard.

  18. AO said,

    A TV in the backyard. For me, it would be a dream come true. I’d love to sit on my deck with a cooler of beer and watch the Sox. The RED Sox.

  19. Linda said,

    Well MT isn’t digging the topic, but I think everyone else is just doing something else today.

    You know us — as Omnius said on his blog, the first few posts are about the topic, then we take it from there. Now and then something totally grabs us, but it’s probably timing + topic in some complicated formula.

    Didn’t the aliens teach you that, Mark? When they sent you back down here to stripmine our psyches?

  20. K2 said,

    Mucus? I hardly even know us.

  21. AO said,

    What’s on tap tonight, K2? Miller Light?

  22. LaFlamme said,

    Not one comment about my name sounding a lot like La Phlegm? You could even be really witty and call me Mucus La Phlegm. I’ve never heard THAT one before.

  23. jarheaddoc said,

    Boogers have a tremendous taste and nutritional value to them. Just ask any kid

  24. AO said,

    Mark, I just thought you might be tired of the same old “La Phlegm” name calling. But, if it would make you feel any better, we could start calling you La Mucus.

  25. AO said,

    JHD, Did you have a good Father’s Day? Get any cool t-shirts?

  26. Linda said,

    Hey, my computer’s back up and the Sox are on!! Life is good.

    Hi jd, you feeling better?

  27. jarheaddoc said,

    I am hot and miserable right now. I am beat from a backwards twenty four hour shift and heading to bed. I get thes teeth yanked in a couple days and hopefully things will get better from there, at least as far as the teeth go.

    Enjoy your vacation

  28. AO said,

    Hey, Linda. Sox’s are on! Beer’s cold…works done…life IS good.

  29. AO said,

    JD, Hope things are better for you tomorrow.

  30. Linda said,

    Life is good except this computer has something funky going on. I know my husband always thinks it’s my fault though he’s too polite **intimidated?** to say so, but this time he can see for himself that it’s in his email.

    So he scanned, but he’s not happy with it yet, so he went to bed. Hmm. Since it’s Fathers Day and all, I’m going to do some diagnostic stuff and try to fix it up. See you later maybe — or tomorrow — go Sox!

  31. K2 said,

    Thanks to my D-sis’s wishing us dads a Happy Father’s Day. Personally, I think it should be Happy Father’s Week, or maybe even Month. But one day? Jews get eight days at Hanuakah, and I get one lowsy day? I smell class action lawsuit here.

    AO, I’m officially done with the cheap shit. I literally had a food allergy to PBR et al. Seriously.

    But I got so bombed on good stuff all weekend with my buddies who were visiting from NY, that I’m currently imbibing with a Clausthauler, a German NA beer. Hey, I love beer, but a drunk’s got to dry out now and then just to make sure he’s not really a drunk, whatever that means. (Read: rationalization.)

    Please still respect me. Just a little.

  32. AO said,

    K2, I’ll still respect you in the morning. Yeah….I promise!

  33. AO said,

    Ooop’s, gotta go. Somebody just tapped a fresh keg! ­čśë

  34. K2 said,

    Vicious, you are.

  35. AO said,


  36. LaFlamme said,

    Speaking of K2’s favorite watering hole, I just got back from Fast Breaks. I eschewed the wings this time and went for the club sandwich. Great club sandwich. And an absolutely charming waitress.
    I’ve said too much.

  37. Linda said,

    Everyone’s choosing their poison, eh?

  38. AO said,

    The wings at Fast Breaks look like something from another planet. Totally alien. Gross.

    Cute waitress, eh? Mark, you bogger flicking, pinky flipping, dog!

  39. LaFlamme said,

    I didn’t say she was cute. I said she was “charming.” Now that i think of it, I’m not even sure I looked at her the whole time. Could’ve been a guy.

  40. Linda said,

    Nice save, Mark. Not.

  41. Linda said,

    Those wings must be real bad. AO, you spit venom whenever they are mentioned!

  42. LaFlamme said,

    I’d have a really witty retort here, but the Sox have a scoring threat.

  43. LaFlamme said,

    A two run, pinch hit double!! I’m friggin agog!

  44. Linda said,

    How bout that Lowell?

  45. AO said,

    But…are you in your back yard??

    Linda, The wings at Fast Breaks look like ET’s lost appendage.

  46. Linda said,

    Been reading the dictionary tonight Mark? Eschew? Agog? Not what one would expect in a blog about boogers

  47. LaFlamme said,

    Okay, this game is outta control! A two-out Red Sox explosion! This is turning into a real booger flicker, folks!

  48. Linda said,


    Now Youkilis is piling it on, that guy is my main man

  49. Linda said,

    Excuse me. Friggin agog. That changes everything.

  50. AO said,

    9-5 Red Sox!! I LOVE those boys!

  51. Linda said,

    Like you said AO, life is good.

  52. LaFlamme said,

    If we had a Red Sox mascot in here, I think it would be Youkilis. It would give us a good chance to chant: “YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK…” We don’t do nearly enough chanting in here.

  53. Linda said,

    Hope I didn’t intimidate you with my dictionary comment, Mark.

  54. LaFlamme said,

    No offense taken, Linda. We all know I have a tendancy toward sesquipediality and hyper cotalexis.

  55. Linda said,

    Yuh. And the juxtaposition of all that and your “booger” style blogs is just what’s so hilarious.

  56. Linda said,

    It will be a while before I say anything bad about the Boston bullpen. These guys suck bog water.

  57. LaFlamme said,

    Hey, you’re talking to a Kansas City Royals fan. They routinely call up people who are passed out under the bleachers to come in and relieve.

  58. Linda said,

    What? Did you say that fans relieving themselves under the bleachers get to go on the field and play ball?

  59. Linda said,

    K2, I just read back about your weekend. I promise I won’t respect you any less in the morning.

  60. LaFlamme said,

    I hate Sunday nights. I’ve always hated Sunday nights. In fact, I’ve blogged on how much I hate Sunday nights. I’m not even expected to go into the office on Mondays anymore and I still hate Sunday nights. Anyone got any therapy for me?

  61. Linda said,

    Wow, that’s tough. I usually dislike them, though certainly not hate. Today’s different since I’m on VACATION.

    I’ve loved Friday nights for about 20 years or more. My husband and I worked at the same hospital then, and there was an informal (and illegal) “pool” every Friday, and I used to win it at least once a month. We’d go to the local watering hole and spend all my winnings on rounds of draft beer for the guys that worked with Tom, while we waited for pizza to be ready to take home for the kids. I don’t eat pizza that often, but to me, Friday night is always pizza and beer and balancing on a barstool, laughing with friends.

    I don’t suppose that helps, but the idea of picking something you love and doing it every Sunday night is where I was going.

  62. LaFlamme said,

    That’s deep, Linda. And very insightful. Thank you. It’s just that every time I do that thing I love on Sunday nights, I get arrested. Dammit, why can’t they just make it legal once and for all?

  63. Linda said,

    I thought you had an in with all the cops? Can’t you ink some kind of deal? you know, a dispensation?

  64. LaFlamme said,

    I would never! Plus, by this point, I’ve forgotten what we’re talking about.

  65. Linda said,

    That happens a lot on this blog, eh? welcome to our world.

  66. LaFlamme said,

    Well, as soon as this whacky game is over, I’ll grab a shower, repent my sins, and post something new. I can’t say it’ll be something coherent, but it’ll be something new.

  67. Linda said,

    Out of curiosity, I checked out a few of the blogs on Omnius’ blog list; you know, to see what kind of company The Screaming Room is keeping. An eclectic list, for sure! I felt like Alice through the looking glass, almost didn’t make my way back out.

  68. Linda said,

    BTW I eschewed comment on any of them ­čÖé

  69. LaFlamme said,

    What? Kwit using big wordz, Linder.

  70. K2 said,

    Eschew? Gesundheit.

    Ah, The Break. (That’s code for Fast Breaks.) My home away from home. They don’t have any guy waitresses, Mark. I think you need the Sportsmen’s Club for that sort of ‘service.’ (Watch out for their bleu cheese, though. And stay away from the ranch, too.)

    I’ll be sure to tell Gary, the FB’s manager, that Lewiston’s most famous drunk, I mean writer, said he received ‘charming’ service. He’ll be glad to hear it.

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