One night in Bangkok

August 18, 2006 at 1:16 am (Uncategorized)

The more I think about the Jon Benet Ramsey case — the botched investigation, the fog of suspicion hanging over the parents, the strange, unsolicited confession from a presumed stranger — I am left with this thought: Man, I’ve got to get to Thailand.

I mean, what really goes on over there? When the media speaks of the Far East country, they don’t talk about the cultural richness, the lush landscape or the peace of the Orient. No, they almost invariably use decadent terms like THRIVING SEX TRADE, SEXUAL HAVEN, or DEVIANT’S PARADISE. I mean, can you really get a hooker with a variety of specialties over there as quickly as you can hail a cab over here? Can you order out like we do for pizza or cable service? Are people doing it like horn dogs in the street? And why haven’t we been invited?


Take a quick stroll around the Internet and you’ll find plenty of how-to guides on maximizing your vacation fun in Thailand: How to get the best, special massage service for your buck. How to avoid getting ripped off by a hooker. How to approach a club manager or a mama-san about special requests. What to tip the lady who did that thing for you with the poodle and the Crisco.

And so on. You can buy a Thailand trip package (hee hee) right now from a variety of groups who make no bones about what they offer. I say go for it. Meet you at the airplane? Swell.

Anyone know if personal lubricants are still allowed on airplanes? What about penicillin?



  1. Mainetarr said,

    I was watching O”reilly last night and he showed an interview he did when he was a reporter for Inside Edition many years ago. He went into a bar with a hidden camera and could have “bought” a girl for three hours for $25 American dollars. She was about 13. Another girl he interviewed was a prostitute. She was nine years old. There are almost as many little boy prostitutes, too. What a sad, sad place. You know, if adults decide to go into the oldest profession, well fine, I say, let them. But to do this to the little children has got to be the most heinous crimes there is. Those kids on tv last night were talking about how they do it for the money, money they send back to their parents who lie in the countryside in Thailand. WTF kind of parent would do that? Send their child out to prostitute for money? Anyone who takes advantage of these kids should be shot right along with the kids parents. I don’t give a shit how poor you are, that’s just wrong. Apparently, the country is not only full of horn dogs, as Mark put it, but they are a bunch of sick greedy bastards as well. WTF would someone find attractive about a 9, 10, 11 or 12 year old girl pole dancing in a thong?

    I am also having some serious doubts about the story this moron, Karr, is telling. Already there have been inconsistencies in his story. Until the DNA (which they have plenty of) results are in, I am not so sure this attention seeker is the one who killed Jon Benet. He may have admitted it, but for a murderer, he sure is enjoying the limelight. Seems like those who enjoy the limelight are SERIAL killers, like BTK, Zodiac, etc… I just think there is something off about this guy. Was he in trouble in Thailand and needed an out? Is there a death penalty in Colorado? Would he rather spend life in prisonfor something he didn’t do than be killed in Thailand? Who knows, but time will tell.

  2. jarheaddoc said,

    I have also heard that Thailand does a rather robust trade in sex change operations, as the restrictions are non-existent compared to the United States.

  3. K2 said,

    D’you know that the annual global AIDS conference was held in Bangkok last year? You can’t make this shit up.

    I’m with MT. When I look at younger girls, I may think, ‘Wow, they’ll be something at 18.’ I don’t think, ‘Wow, I want to purchase her for suckie suckie.’ Sex with kids is as gross as it gets. Just utterly deplorable. Sex with an 18 year old, well . . . uh-oh, there’s a pup tent in my trousers.

    I think Karr just wants (a sick form of) attention. His ex-wife says he was in Alabama on the day ot the killing. But why did they arrest him? That’s what I’m waiting to hear — the evidence.

  4. K2 said,

    And somebody tell me why I paid $70 for a eSJ subscription last year, when half the time — like the last three days — I can’t even load the fucking site.

  5. Bobbie said,

    Yes, we have the death penalty in Colorado. We’ve executed one person since 1975 when it was reinstated. There are currently 2 males on death row here. Before 1976, there were 101 people executed here. The above site will give you information on any state, plus the military.

  6. Bobbie said,

    I’d say that the SJ saw you coming, K2.

  7. Bobbie said,

    Now Karr’s ex-wife is saying that she can’t specifically recall Christmas 1996. Too many holes for my liking (no pun intended).

  8. Linda said,

    Just don’t get arrested in Thailand. Very bad news. Or so I hear.

  9. jarheaddoc said,

    China has got to be about the worst place to be in prison, especially for a capital offense. The trial (sic) and penalty phase are both done in the same day, and it’s usually a death sentence. The family gets a bill for the bullet and burial and your organs are on e-bay before you’re even cold in the ground.

  10. Mainetarr said,

    I don’t understand laws in this country either. Why would anyone who has been convicted of child molestation be allowed to go free, ever? So we can watch them on Oprah telling how they are tempted everyday, and how it is such a struggle for them to not commit the crimes again? Give me a freaking break. Jessica Lundsfords father is desperately trying to pass Jessica’s law and do you think Maine would pass it? Of course not. Vermont, neither. It’s a joke really. These bastards need to be locked up on the first offense, not the fifth. Grrrrrrrr, NOTHING makes me madder than this topic. We are supposed to protect our children. I don’t have children, I know, I know, but I highly doubt a molester would even MAKE it to court if they molested my child. The one in court would be me, on a manslaughter charge.

  11. jarheaddoc said,

    I heard this expression once, and it makes all the sense in the world: you can judge a country by how its children and criminals are treated. The sad fact is that we go further towards protecting the rights of the accused than we do protecting our children.

  12. LaFlamme said,

    It’s a fact about the lame ass turnstile provided to pedophiles. I once saw an 81 year old man go free after admitting to molesting an entire family of children. The DA at the time said the man’s health was a factor. Also involved in the kiddie orgy was the kids’ mother. Worst case of child molestation I’ve ever seen in this area.

  13. LaFlamme said,

    You can blame the beast for the SJ problems. The server has been getting hammered since that story broke. This from Eric:
    Hi All,
    As you know our Web site has been getting hammered the last couple of days. The traffic hasn’t let up and it’s taking its toll on the server. Currently the server is offline. We will let you know when it’s back up.

  14. K2 said,

    You have to blame the insufficiency of the servers at eSJ, as well. Think of all the people who are now frustrated with the eSJ and will bad mouth it. Just one of those things where a business has no contingency planning, and it nips them in the bud.

  15. LaFlamme said,

    Get Thai’d! You’re talking to a tourist
    Whose every move’s among the purest
    I get my kicks above the waistline, sunshine

  16. LaFlamme said,

    Yep. I’ve been getting mail from people asking me to send today’s story. They’ll eventually find it elsewhere. Not good preparedness here.

  17. LaFlamme said,

    I don’t see you guys rating
    The kind of mate I’m contemplating
    I’d let you watch, I would invite you
    But the queens we use would not excite you

    So you better go back to your bars, your temples, your massage parlours

  18. K2 said,

    Yeah, you find/write the gold story of the day, and they aren’t prepared to handle the load. Don’t you hate that?

    And I now know your disdain for editors. One of my Alt Med articles got totally hacked this month, and they even injected a typo that’s not in my original. Me no happy.

    ‘What to tie me up with some of your ties, Tye?’

  19. AO said,

    K2, who are you writing for? Can your articles be viewed online?

  20. Treehugger said,

    Damn, if you think about it. There is alot of taxable income to be made and it would get the states deficit in line.
    It would also provide jobs for some of these street kids.

  21. Linda said,

    Mark, I hope you are getting the credit you deserve for all this. If you didn’t exist, the LSJ would have to invent you. (but even if they ALL tried very hard at the exact same time, I’m not sure that the lot of them could even imagine you)

  22. Linda said,

    Mark, when I said “credit for all this,” I hope it was clear that I meant the beast thing, rather than the Bangkok thing 🙂

  23. K2 said,

    AO, it’s Alternative Medicine, out of Boulder, CO. They have a website, but no, they want you to buy the mag to read the articles. (Imagine that.) I’ve got one short news piece (news pieces are 200-300 words) in the Sept. issue, and have five more in their recent Natural Solutions supplemental issue. I’ve got four more coming in the Oct. issue. They recently asked me to start writing intermediate articles, so I’m currently working on a 1,200 word piece on the rise of autoimmune diseases, most likely a result of environmental factors, to wit, pesticides and plastics. Presuming I pass this test, they want me to write feature articles (2,500-3,000 words) in the upcoming months.

    Glad to have some work, so thanks for asking. Now if my kids would let me get anything done. . . .

  24. AO said,

    That’s great, K2. And, I’m sure you’ll pass with flying colors. Tell me, do you ever interject any of your humor into your articles?

  25. K2 said,

    Not often, but I did get this one through (no pun intended):

    In this high-tech age, when the under-50 set hears “digital rectal exam,” they imagine diagnostic computers and state-of-the-art graphics. The over-50 set, however, knows all too well that the “digital” part means super-low tech. But they endure the exam because finding and eliminating precancerous colon polyps, called adenomas, provide the best defense against developing colorectal cancer, the second most deadly cancer in the West. Blah, blah, blah. . . .

  26. Dave said,

    Pay? For the Sun-Journal? You can’t be serious.

  27. K2 said,

    Oh, I did. Two years in a row. Just to get it online. Me no smart.

    So, when do you fight Nick in a steel-cage death match?

    And Dave, you never did tell me the impetus for

  28. LaFlamme said,

    Hey, I just took my hits from a paintball gun. Those guys thought I was crazy for me to be volunteering to be target practice. They were happy to oblige, though. Picture Pacino at the end of Scarface or James Caan in the tollboth. I was much cooler than either of them.

  29. K2 said,

    I’m thinking the end of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. You know — leave it to the imagination.

  30. LaFlamme said,

    Warren Beatty in Bonnie and Clyde?

  31. K2 said,

    The bus in The Gauntlet?

  32. AO said,

    Did anyone hit you in the ‘nads?

  33. Linda said,

    More fun and games at the SJ? by the way is the server up? I had to wait until I was home to read the actual paper. My workplace gets a rival rag, which annoys me no end, and today no online peeking

  34. jarheaddoc said,

    I didn’t have much luck with the server today, either. Maybe those close minded bastards are purposely keeping it off line so no one will attack Nick for being a whiny transplant bastard

  35. Linda said,

    Is he still doing that? Well, keep bashing him and eventually he’ll sweeten up I’m sure jd.

  36. AO said,

    In person he’s not that bad of a guy. He was very friendly.

  37. Linda said,

    Having been on the receiving end of jarheaddoc’s xenophobia, I’d say that he can be won over with the right persistence. jd stopped bashing me even before he found out I grew up in Maine. Eh, mate?

    Not sure Nick is motivated that way though — seems he might rather stir the pot. We’ll see.

  38. AO said,

    He does “stir the pot”. I think he just got off on the wrong foot. BUT, we’ll see how he progresses.

    I had to send my family off to the Balloon Festival without me. My allergies are out of control. SNIFF. It’s only the second time since it started that I’ve missed the opening night.

  39. Linda said,

    Sorry you are missing the balloons.

  40. AO said,

    Thanks. So am I. I did just see one from my front yard. It seems to be just…hanging there. It’s very still out tonight.

  41. Linda said,

    Going on a sex tour to Thailand is so snakes on a plane, mate.

  42. LaFlamme said,

    Wow. It’s already considered contemporary nomenclature?

  43. Linda said,

    Thirty three entries in the Urban Dictionary

  44. LaFlamme said,

    Straight? Word.

  45. AO said,

    Well, with that said, guess it’s a “must” see. I did read several reviews by “regular” people today. Even the ones who gave it an overall rating of an F said it was just so much fun.

  46. LaFlamme said,

    Somebody come up with a killer title for my new movie about sexual adventure in Thailand. I figure the word Bangkok alone should put this thing at the top of the box office.

  47. AO said,

    Bangkok or, Bangcock?

  48. LaFlamme said,

    Pervert. I wasn’t even thinking thaaaaat.

  49. Linda said,

    Thai’d Up In Bangkok?

  50. LaFlamme said,

    Pretty good. I suck at this kind of thing. I don’t even write my own headlines.

  51. AO said,

    You don’t?? OMG!! I’m going to be scarred for life!

  52. LaFlamme said,

    No way. If I did, it would always be BOY TRAPPED IN FREEZER EATS OWN FOOT. Even if it was a story about a city council meeting.

  53. Linda said,

    Samuel L Jackson insisted that they stay with Snakes On A Plane as the movie’s title, instead of changing it to Pacific Air 121 or some such lame thing. If we come up with the perfect title, you may have to go to the wall for creative control. We’d support you all the way of course with a vigorous internet campaign.

  54. Linda said,

    So you’ve obviously been to a lot of city council meetings, eh?

  55. Dave said,

    KR –

    Steel Cage death match? Wow… think I like that possibility.

    The impetus for is mainly a desire to return to writing. But since I’ve launched it, I’ve been too busy to write as much as I would like. Now that I have no vacation time left, I should be able to focus more.

    I’d love to be a columnist a la Dave Barry, or even Mark LaFlamme… but don’t have the wish to starve or live in poverty at this time, thus the blog is just a personal outlet for me.

    The other hope for the site is to have several community members actively particpate as columnists as well, thus giving the community another perspective than the traditional news outlets.

    Oh – while the topic is on rather perverted sexual things, read this story in the Ellisworth American about a choir director that was convicted of molesting some of his singers. A truly sick individual. A truly sick story. One quote from him, ““I am a boy lover, which means I care very deeply for boys,” he said.”

  56. LaFlamme said,

    I detest city council meetings. You think it’s done, a councilman has an afterthought, and they all get going for another two hours. Few things make me cry. City council meetings make me cry.

  57. AO said,

    If Mark had to give the movie a title it would be “BOY TRAPPED IN FREEZER EATS OWN FOOT”. I like “Snakes on a Plane” more.

  58. AO said,

    Dave, do I even DARE click on that link you provided? I think not! But, I DO love your site! I check it out all the time. For some reason, unknown to me, I can’t seem to get your photos. Is there a problem with that?

  59. Linda said,

    Dave, that’s a really infuriating story. Sounds like his defense was: I didn’t do it, but if I DID do it, it wasn’t wrong.

  60. Linda said,

    I used to get your photos, Dave, but now I don’t either.

  61. LaFlamme said,

    You think Dave Barry is impoverished?

  62. Linda said,

    The thing with Dave Barry is that he worked for a big paper that syndicated his column. Mark, on the other hand, works for a paper that doesn’t have enough bandwidth to keep its web site up when he writes an unusually tasty story.

  63. AO said,

    MMM…Dave Barry…I just love that guy! I hate that all of his columns are…old. I’m old! I don’t want to read OLD stuff!

    Mark does write “unusually tasty “stories and hey, that’s why we all like him. Well, um, I don’t think we really LIKE him We just all like each other so, that’s why we keep blogging here. Right?

  64. Linda said,

    Our gracious host.

  65. Bobbie said,

    I just signed into the SJ for shins and grins. I clicked the log in button and it automatically signed me in. What the hell is up with that?

  66. LaFlamme said,

    Are they eliminating the log in function? That’d be nice.

  67. AO said,

    Yeah, he is “gracious”. Well, except when he’s showing you a paw of “the beast’. Then, he just want’s to point ou all the maggots on it. Boy, he REALLY did make me hungry the other night. Nothing like maggots.

  68. Bobbie said,

    Here’s a site for everyone to check out. It is definitely warped.

  69. AO said,

    Ha. I never have to log into the SJ website. Ever.

  70. LaFlamme said,

    You save your sign on information, you mean?

  71. AO said,

    I guess. I just log onto it everyday. No sign in process.

  72. LaFlamme said,

    Oh, that’s me. I told them to never, ever make you sign in. Yep. I did that.

  73. LaFlamme said,

    Hey, Bobbie. Can you write me at work?

  74. AO said,

    Ohh..I feel so…special. Thanks.

  75. Dave said,

    Hmm… I can see photos on my site…. what do you mean? I’ve even added a specific “photo gallery” section on the top menu. Do you view via a newsreader?

    And no, Barry is definitely not poor, but he paid his dues as a reporter for quite a while before hitting the big time. And, for all I know, LaFlamme makes the big bucks, too. Was that him in that flashy Lexus I saw in Bar Harbor?

  76. LaFlamme said,

    That was me, alright. Except it was a 1990 Stanza and it was in Brewer.

  77. Dave said,


    My mistake on the photos. Started using a new software called Blogdesk to update the site. Missed an important configuration issue.

    bye – bye – got some work to do.

  78. AO said,

    Flashy Lexus? Nah…Flashy KIA, yes, Lexus, no. I almost hit that KIA.

    Dave, I don’t know why you’re pictures won’t come up. I just…view. Newsreader? At the risk of sounding computer Illiterate …what??

  79. LaFlamme said,

    AO, a Newsreader is a service wherein you hire someone to come over to your house to open up the pictures for you. Typically, it is a Thia woman who came to America to escape the perils and pressures of prostitution. You should look in the yellow pages.

  80. AO said,

    Um, I think I’ll pass. I’ll figure it out on my own.

  81. Linda said,

    By the way, if anyone wants to read an article called “Nice Ass! Why I Own Donkeys”, just let me know and I will post the link. It’s by one of my faves (Jon Katz) and is only for the seriously animal mad.

    I mention it only because we were talking about TITLES, and I think you will agree that it’s a great title.

  82. Linda said,

    What the heck kind of story is this? I know it’s not pedophilia, but crazy is as crazy does.

  83. AO said,

    Post it, Linda. Just the “title” makes me want to read it!

  84. AO said,

    Mark, I keep meaning to ask: Is that Herb with a mask on, in the photo above?

  85. Dave said,

    Very funny Mark.

    A newsreader is a software thingy that allows you to subscribe to RSS feeds from websites that offer them. You can filter by subject/author/ whatever. What it does is saves you time from surfing a gadzillion websites to get the information you want to see. Just subscribe to news sources and categories that you’re interested in and view them in the reader.

    RSS stands for “real simple syndication”.

    An example of a news reader is Google Reader.

  86. AO said,

    Okay, Dave. Thanks for the info. But, tell me, why is it I could view the photos on your site..two weeks ago but, can’t view them now? I guess I’ll just have to muddle through it.

  87. LaFlamme said,

    In news that has nothing to do with Thailand, the Sox just blew a lead in a big, big way. The Royals, on the other hand, swept a double header from the A’s.

  88. Linda said,

    Here you go, AO. You’re going to love Jon Katz too, though you may not necessarily lick the monitor …

  89. Linda said,

    Mark, just …. oh never mind.

  90. Dave said,

    AO – I attempted to simplify the updating of my site by using some new software. And screwed up.

    I’ll have it corrected soon.

  91. K2 said,

    The SJ site is going to be free from now on — no log in or anything. I got a letter from the ciruclation manager saying so. It’s almost too bad, I was looking forward to not renewing my subscription.

    Dave, I’ll have to start checking out your site more. Thanks for explaining it.

  92. Bobbie said,

    I did as you requested.

  93. Brenda said,

    One of the professors I had at a community college in CA, about 12 -15 years ago, had gone to Brazil with cameras to interview girls working in brothels there. By the time a girl is in her early twenties, she’s too old to work. It was sad. The prof was really pissed about the rich american men going there for that type of recreation, and she was probably involved in some kind of activism to help those girls, one way or another. She said she intended to return.
    There was also a film about sex- change operations, in that same class, that showed the surgery being done (I turned away- I like penises too much to watch one being sliced & inverted…but I heard everything) and the operation was common in Thailand, the film showed many men—> women who had this done in Thailand. They looked very pretty, too.

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